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You've probably seen me on TV, so you know for sure that even though I'm not the brightest person on Earth, I'm definitely one of the most loveable guys in the neighborhood. I was born in North Carolina and was raised by my dad (Abe), and all I know about my mom is that she has been running from the law (don't ask me the details... because I know nothing about it!!!). I have a wonderful wife and three adorable kids. My hobbies include drinking Duff and eating just about anything, but my favorite foods are donuts and pork chops: Yummy!

TV, Beer, Food, Beer, Bowling, Beer, ... and of course, Beer!!!

Look Who's Oinking

Million Dollar Movies "Big Gorilla Week"

So, You've Decided To Steal Cable

"Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try."